Thursday, September 29, 2011

My Father In Law Probably Thinks I Can't Cook

So every meal I've made today has been a complete disaster, except for dinner.
Let me start off by saying that I had not yet gone grocery shopping and we were pretty bare. For lunch, I looked what we had and decided to try my own recipe. I found some noodles, sliced tomatoes, shrimp, and cheese. I tossed in some hot sauce and Italian seasoning. After 30 minutes the meal was cooked. I mixed in some cheese, then added some on top. And realized there was mold. Great. Flipping great. I just made a moldy cheese meal for my husband and father in law. This meal was going down the drain. I was so frustrated but had an appointment to go too so they were stuck with peanut butter and jelly sandwiches because we had no meat. I know - I'm awful.
After my appointment I head on over to the grocery store where I pick up some much needed groceries. We decided to make some lasagna. I gathered the necessary ingredients and headed home. I also want to add that I was making a meal for my friend whose daughter had surgery. I would have shared my lasagna but she's allergic to tomatoes. I was making her a chicken broccoli casserole. I turned on the oven, got the noodles for lasagna going, and began prepping the chicken. It seemed as if the oven was taking a while to preheat and I was starting to smell something. That's when it hit me. I had put some dishes in the oven. One being a plastic cutting board. That cutting board was slightly melted. Well, now I couldn't cook the chicken because I was afraid something from the plastic would ruin it. Thank goodness I could boil it! While I began layering the lasagna and finishing the rice for the casserole, I cranked up the oven in hopes that it would burn off any residue.
And that my friends, is what happened to me in the kitchens. Best of luck to you on your cooking endeavors.

Ever Felt a Finger Nail in Your Eye?

Tuesday night I was playing with Rod when he grabbed my face and scratched me. Ok mister, its time to cut your nails. I plop him on my lap and do his thumb. Next up pointer. Easy peasy lemon squeezy. Then I get to his middle finger. CLIP! That little clipping flew right into my eye! It hurt so bad. It stung and worst of all, it itched but I couldn't scratch it.
I had to have Mike take Rodney and then help get the nail clipping out of my eye. All I wanted to do was rub my eye and get the stupid thing out. I could feel my eye becoming more and more irritated by the second. We go to the bathroom and Mike can't see it. Go figure. SO I have to move my eye around until the clipping moves. Then he spots it! Yahoo!
Except I'm a pain in the butt and I can't keep my eye from moving. It was so uncomfortable and my eye kept going to the only "comfy spot." But I was able to be a big girl and hold still while Mike took it out with a q tip.
My eye still feels funny, I'm sure the clipping scratched it a bit, but I am sure glad to get that out of my eye!

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

I Hate Good byes

I had a marvelous weekend. I got to see both sides of my family. I started off in Oklahoma and got to see my Pa. Every time I see him it gets harder and harder. I want to see my Maamaw and Pa. Not just my Pa. I love him dearly and I hate seeing him hurt over the loss of his wife. My phone still has his phone number listed under Maamaw and Pa, my address book still shows Maamaw and Pa, and not matter what, I can't think about Pa without Maamaw. Now I realize that this may sound silly, but it is really hard. Now I have more fears to add to my already fear ridden thoughts.
The last time I saw my Maamaw was January 2010. Mike and I were meeting friends in Orlando for the Disney World Half Marathon. We wanted to visit with them before we went to Orlando.
I had called my grandparents prior to going down. I told them that I had mailed them a package and they should receive it shortly. My sister called the day we were to arrive to find out what they were doing. They were in Georgia getting some pecans. I quickly looked on a map to see how far away the town they were in was and it wasn't too much out of the way! I talked Mike into taking me to see if we could meet them at the pecan plant. Turns out this small town had about eight pecan plants. We drove to each one not seeing them. Then low and behold I look over and see them! I told Mike to follow them but he couldn't get over. We ended up not being able to locate them. So, we continued on our way to their house. We arrived and waited. And waited. And waited. My grandparents were not typical. Sitting in the house all day watching CNN was not something they did. They were out and about Party animals of the senior citizen crowd! :) Knowing it could be awhile, we drove to cracker barrel to eat. Mind you, we had been gone for quite some time. I called just before we got to her house.
"Hi Maamaw"

"Hello, how are you?"

"I'm doing great. Have you received your package yet?" At this point we are at their house and I'm getting out of the car.

"No not yet. I had my neighbor watch for it but she hasn't seen the UPS man."


"Just a minute I think that's the UPS man now."

Both Maamaw and Pa come to their door. They have decorative windows on the door and because of this you can only see the outline of people. This is the conversation we heard.

Maamaw "Who is it?"

Pa "I don't know I can't see"

Maamaw "It looks like two of them. Does UPS come with two drivers?"

Pa "I don't know let me open the door"

Meanwhile, I'm holding my breath because all I want to do is burst out laughing. I mean, these two are the cutest couple you will ever meet. They opened the door and my Pa grabbed me and gave me a big bear hug. They were so surprised and we were so glad to see them! Oh what a wonderful week we had. Just a grand time of hanging out and enjoying each others company. I'll never forget the day we left.

We said our good byes. I was sad. I told them I couldn't wait to see them again. We got in the car and I told Mike we would never wait that long to see them again. I didn't care what it took we would visit. I told him I was scared to leave because my Maamaw was sick and I didn't want anything to happen to her. He told me "Don't worry nothing will happen." He was wrong. He was very very wrong. She died before I could see her. I was in the same town, minutes away from the hospital and she died. I never got to say goobye and she never got to meet Rodney. This moment in my life has changed me.

Every time I say good bye to my Pa, Grandma or Grandpa I get scared. Sunday night, Monday night, and this afternoon I have had panic attacks. Thankfully they were small and I managed to get them under control. But all I could think of was that I hope they are ok and I can see them again. I hate that what happened with my Maamaw has affected me so much but I can't help it. I hate laying in bed at night with horrible thoughts going through my head, clammy, sweaty skin, and feeling nauseated. It probably doesn't help that I forgot my zoloft when I left for vacation. It was the first thing I grabbed when I got home. Hopefully it kicks in soon because I am through with this crappy feeling.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Virtuous Wife

Who can find a virtuous wife?
For her worth is far above rubies.
The heart of her husband safely trusts her;
So he will have no lack of gain.
She does him good and not evil
All the days of her life.
She seeks wool and flax,
And willingly works with her hands.
She is like the merchant ships,
She brings her food from afar.
She also rises while it is yet night,
And provides food for her 
And a portion for her 
She considers a field and buys it;
From her profits she plants a vineyard.
She girds herself with strength,
And strengthens her arms.
She perceives that her 
merchandise is good,
And her lamp does not go out by night.
She stretches out her hands to 
the distaff,
And her hand holds the spindle.
She extends her hand to the poor
Yes, she reaches out her hands to the needy.
She is not afraid of snow for her household
For all her household is clothed
with scarlet.
She makes tapestry for herself; 
Her clothing is fine linen and purple.
Her husband is known in the gates,
When he sits among the elders of the land.
She makes linen garments and sells them,
And supplies sashes for the
Strength and honor are her clothing;
She shall rejoice in time to come.
She opens her mouth with 
And on her tongue is the law of
She watches over the ways of
her household,
And does not eat the bread of idleness.
Her children rise up
and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises
"Many daughters have done well, but you excel them all."
Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing,
But a woman who fears the 
Lord, she shall be praised.
Giver her of the fruit of her hands,
And let her own works praise her in the gates.
Holy Bible, New King James version

I may never be the virtuous wife (does such a woman exist?)  but I can be the best wife I know how to be. 

Sunday, September 18, 2011

First Night Without Hot Rod

Last night one of my best friends got married.  (Congrats Shar Shar)  My mom watched Hot Rod while Mike and I attented the wedding.  Half way through the reception, we get a text from my mom saying "You have the night to yourselves!  Enjoy!"  I had Mike call to make sure we read that correctly.  Sure enough, my mom wanted to keep him.  Since we were having so much fun dancing we figured it would be ok.  Fast forward to the end of the night and I was home by 12:30.

I walked around the house, munching on popcorn and watching a movie on netflix.  I enjoyed my night to the fullest.  I went to bed around 2:00 a.m.  Mike woke me up at noon!  NOON! I can't believe I slept through the night AND slept in!  It was wonderful!  It was amazing!  It was refreshing!  I even hung out in bed for a while because I had nothing else to do.  I ended up sewing.  I started working on a coat for my dog and finished a cloth book for Hot Rod.  Thank goodness I'm done with that!  I went to get him until 4:50 p.m.  I think he missed us!

There is only one problem.  I did not feel guilty.  Well, now I feel guilty for not feeling guilty.  Most women I've talked too have said that the first time they leave their wee ones they feel guilty and worry about them all night.  Me, I did not.  I enjoyed every little selfish minute of it.  Of course I thought about Hot Rod, even went into the nursery and though, I miss the little guy.  But over all, I enjoyed getting to be the "old me."  Know what I mean?  It was just nice to be able to sew without having to stop, sit down and veg with out having to get up and chase Rodney.  I guess maybe I knew where he was and knew that if there was a problem my mom or sister would call.  I just feel guilty for enjoying my free time.  I know so many mommies do not get that, but I did and I am thankful.  I just wish I didn't have the "after guilt." 

Sunday, September 11, 2011

September 11th 2001 - we will never forget - or will we?

I woke up this morning and my Facebook was exploding with "10 years ago I was...."  I couldn't help but think of December 7th 1941.  Does anyone know what day December 7, 2011 will be?  Most people don't know.  December 7th of this year will be the 70th anniversary of Pear Harbor.  My parents generation, and my generation, did not experience Pearl Harbor.  We know it was a terrible day in which the Japanese attacked the small Island of Oahu, HI.  It does not affect us like it does someone who remembers where they were on that date.  December 7th is often a day that most people don't even think about.
While most of us will know the feeling of the horrible tragedy - my children will not.  They will grow up know that something terrible happened on that day. And they will go about their business.  Its a sad fact but its true.  They wont know the feeling of what its like to wake up one day and seeing a horrible image on the tv screen.  I pray they never do.  My only hope is that the next generation can know that there are two dark days in our history and to keep them in mind when the anniversaries dates come. 
That being said, 10 years ago I was running late for college.  I hopped in my car and turned on the radio.  I heard news.  I changed station of station and it was the news.  I didn't realize what was happening.  As I got to school I had heard that a plane had gone into the world trade center.  I parked my car and quickly got to class.  The news was so new that no one in the class knew about it.  Like I said, I was late.  I remember a man with a back pack that said, United States Army.  I also remember thinking that his life was about to change forever because he was going to go fight.  At this point was it any question that we would go to war?  I didn't pay attention in class, when it was over I went to the commons.  There was a small tv set up with people surrounding it, seeing for the first time what has happened in our country. 
All I wanted to do was go home.  I raced home as fast as I could and watched the horror  unfold as it replayed over and over on my tv.  Mike was in Japan at the time and he called me.  We discussed what was going on - but I don't remember what we said.  After we said our goodbyes I went to work at walmart. 
It was empty.  There was nobody there.  I assume everyone was at home glued to their screen.  I too wanted to be home with my family.  Its a sad day and a horrible event.  I will never forget this day or what I was doing on this day.
I know my children wont and I'm ok with that.  I don't want them to know the feeling of what its like to have their country attacked. 
Today, my heart goes out to all those who lost their lives on this day.  My heart goes out to all those who lost someone on this day.  My heart goes out to all members of the Armed Forces of our country and those of countries fighting with us.  I give you thanks.   God Bless each and everyone one of you today, tomorrow, and always.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Good Morning Girls

Well,  in just a few days the new season of Good Morning Girls will start again.  It's a wonderful program.  I grew so much in my faith and learned a lot.  I encourage anyone to join.  Especially if you are shy and afraid to attend a bible study alone, don't have to opportunity to join a bible study, or just want the extra guidance for devotion.  The summer session was spent going of Ministry of Motherhood by Salley Clarkson.  For the fall session we will be reading the book of 1 John.  It really takes just minutes a day.  If this sounds like something your interested in, click the button below.  I would love for you to walk this journey with me.

click me!

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Michigan and Wisconsin

We are home - and we will be for a little while! YAHOO! It has been great getting to visit everyone but I am so glad to be home. This summer we have been to Illinois, Wisconsin, Florida (3 times), Kansas, and Michigan. Hot Rod is glad to be home too! Now, on to the good stuff!

We went on the trip for Mikes family reunion. It's really a special place. Everyone meets at a cabin that was built by his great grandfather. Every member of the family holds this place in their heart. I know that Mike was really excited to share a part of his childhood with our son.
A view from the cabin porch    


I posted about leaving from the road.  It wasn't too bad, we left late but Rod slept pretty well.  By morning however, he was ready to get out.  We decided to stop on the beach of Lake Michigan.  It was incredibly foggy and overcast.  The weather was still nice so we were able to strip Hot Rod to a diaper and let him get dirty!

It took us about 15 hours to arrive.  Boy were we glad to get there.  I could tell Rod wanted to hit the lake.  He loves the water.  He was not a huge fan of this water!  It was cold.  Once he got used to it he was ok.  We still didn't stay in long.  When we are around Mikes family, Mike loves to show off Rod.  It is the cutest thing.  And it gives me a break.  I was able to read an entire book in just two days!
I read the Jaycee Dugard book. It was a hard read!  It does have a happy ending!  I couldn't even put it down.  I read about 40 pages and then it got better.  I can't say whether you should read it or not.  I think thats totally up to you.  She does go into detail and not everyone wants to or can handle knowing details of what she endured.  I'm not sure i can myself.  In fact, I had weird dreams and nightmares for about a week after reading it.  I'm glad I'm done with it. 
Even though I got a rare moment to read, vacationing with a baby is different.  I still get up in the middle of the night, I still breast feed, the trip itself is longer because he wants to get up and move around and instead of sleeping in a tent, we slept inside.   On the plus side, I was also to sleep in.  Thanks babe!  I appreciated that very much! 
The weekend was good.  Full of family, laughter, great food, horseshoes, campfire, and s'mores.  I know Mike was happy we could have made it out this year.
This Jacket was hand made by Mike's Aunt Jennie.  Is it not the cutest thing you've ever seen?

One of the coolest things that happened was feeding swans.  My father in law, Dave, told me that they haven't been around for 20 years.  Both Mike and his dad were excited to see them especially since this was Rod's first year at the cabin.  There is a picture of Mike as a child feeding the swans.  Rod is up next in line.  It was great to see them though.  They ate right out of my hand!  Here is a picture of them.  They were beautiful.  Mean, but beautiful.

On Sunday, it was time to leave.  Since I didn't get to go to Mackinac Island, I talked Mike into stopping at my favorite lighthouse and ice cream shop.  If you have never had Peanut Butter Mackinac Island Fudge Ice cream you must try it!  It is so delicious! I think I added an our to our trip but it was worth it.  Mike might not admit it now, but one day he will! haha